7 Day 3

Day 3 officially begins.  Only one change made so far ... the sweater has been dropped in exchange for a short sleeve polo shirt.  So, nothing to cover my arms for the month of May.  This is a gamble since it snowed last year on Mother's Day, but there is also a risk with the sweater - mainly that I would alternate between two tee's while the sweater collects dust in the closet.  It was really hot yesterday, and will remain so all week.  I can deal with cold, but the idea of a black sweater in 80 degree sunshine sounds horrid.

Yesterday was my first real opportunity to ditch this exercise or commit.  The dishwasher soap opened up in the car when Kate was coming home from the store.  In the cleanup process I got a bunch of it on my one pair of jeans, and that soon dried into a white mess on the front of my new dark denim.  We had church coming at us, so I could have sneakily swapped the jeans for a less marred pair.  Nobody but me would have known.  I have to admit it was tempting.  I mean, what would people think of a man who went to church in a gray tee shirt and dirty jeans?!?

I stuck with the jeans - nobody noticed.

It felt so teen-agey to be worried about what people may think of my jeans.  I know that I would not notice another man's pants, but for some reason I picture the other men of the church worried about the state of my jeans.  Sheesh.

So much energy spent on worry about the outside while the inside is left unattended.  The inside is the soil that God is focused on, that is the garden he is tending for us.  We groom, buy, and primp so we can put on a show at church (our show is pretty weak even without the dirty jeans, but it still crossed my mind, so is an issue), then we get there and by-and-large avoid making any contact with any people there.  We've been going to this church for over a year, and hardly know a person.  I forget names before I hear them, and check the box off of my weekly to-do list.  Is that what church and community is supposed to be?


All of the believers devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching, and to fellowship, and to sharing in meals (including the Lord's Supper), and to prayer.

A deep sense of awe came over them all, and the apostles performed many miraculous signs and wonders.  And all the believers met together in one place and shared everything they had. They sold their property and possessions and shared the money with those in need. They worshiped together at the Temple each day, met in homes for the Lord's Supper, and shared their meals with great joy and generosity - all the while praising God and enjoying the goodwill of all the people. And each day the Lord added to their fellowship those who were being saved.

-- Acts : 42-47

I need to get over myself.  Church is for community.  If we are there just to feel good about ourselves we are not there for the right reason.  Lord, change my heart.  Give me courage to engage, and truly invest and trust your people.