Saturday, February 16, 2013

Forgiveness

Forgiveness - why do we struggle so much with offering it?  Our Father has offered us forgiveness, yet we often have trouble extending it to our fellow human beings.  We tell ourselves that there are many reasons we withhold forgiveness, but in reality the reason we hold onto hurts boils down to pride.  We feel that we are justified in holding onto our hurt, we feel that we are owed an apology, we feel that we need to stew on the bitterness because it is our due.


What if God held that same attitude toward you?  God has offered you forgiveness for your sins, so who are you to be justified in withholding forgiveness for an other's sin?  The Bible speaks over and over again about the importance of forgiveness - as followers of Christ we are called to emulate him and the Father and forgive.  We are not called to forgive when someone is sorry, but to forgive always.

For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.  But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.
  - Matthew 6:14-15

Forgiveness is a trait of our Father and our Savior.  How could we possibly claim to be followers of God the Father and Jesus if we refuse to follow the example he set before us?  What would Jesus call us if we explained to him that we appreciate his forgiveness, but that we just can't forgive someone for their sins against us?  Hypocrite? Double minded? Sinner?  Yes, yes, and yes.

We are called to forgive. We are called to forgive lies, cheats, pains, abuses, hypocrisy, theft, even unforgivenss. Our forgiveness cannot be predicated by someone else's actions. As followers of Christ we are called to be His example to the world. As he said, we will be forgiven as we forgive. How many people have allowed their pride to separate themselves from the Love that is offered to us? We cannot be followers of Christ if we refuse to follow him. As James said:

What good is it, my brothers, if a man claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save him?

Show me your faith without deeds, and I will show you my faith by what I do. You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that - and shudder.
- James 2:14 , 18-19

In my life, it has been easiest to withhold forgiveness is when the person who hurt me refused to acknowledge that fact.  I've told myself, "I am not going to forgive until they apologize."  Yet that flies in the face of what Christ did for me.  Even at the point of the greatest pain of his life, he offered forgiveness to those who had no desire for it, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing." - Luke 23:35

Forgiveness is a fruit of the Spirit.  Forgiveness is a sign of a follower of Christ.  As we move forward in our journey with Christ it should be something that comes easier and easier, but it will never come without some measure of pain - true life rarely does.  We have to learn to let it go, to give our hurt over to God and allow Him to take it away from us. 

If you are struggling with unforgiveness, I encourage you to pray.  Ask God to show you the splinters of bitterness that you hang onto and allow him to remove them from your heart.  When I first prayed this prayer I was amazed by the years of small hurts that I was clinging to - things I hadn't thought of in years, yet I could recall with perfect clarity because I refused to let them go.  It was a painful process, yet once it was done I felt a freedom I'd never even imagined could exist.  More amazing than the years of bitterness revealed was the lightness of my spirit once the weight of my burden was lifted.  The Freedom of Christ is truly fantastic.

For more on forgiveness and the cancer of unforgivenss I strongly recommend the book The Bait of Satan by John Bevere.  It isn't an easy read, but it will help shine a light on how destructive offense and unforgivenss are in your spirit.  I also encourage you to find a group of believers to discuss this with as talking through it can be very helpful in releasing the pains of the past.  Christ has freedom waiting for you, but you must let go of your pride and forgive as you are forgiven.  As C.S. Lewis says in The Great Divorce:

There are only two kinds of people in the end: those who say to God, 'Thy will be done,' and those to whom God says in the end, 'Thy will be done.'

As always, the choice to live in freedom is yours - what will you do with it?

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